--Why did they chop off the top of the Statue of Liberty and place it on a float?
--"Why do all the band majorettes look like the Rockettes?"
"They're trying to look like Judy Garland singing 'Get Happy,' you idiot."
"So why aren't they standing there popping pills?"
--"This float has 650 of the best cheerleaders in the country on one float."
"Oh, wow. That means there are 650 of the bitchiest women in America, all on one float."
"And why are they all white?"
--Gee, that high school band REALLY rocked out to 'I Gotta Feeling'...
--At least Gladys Knight was there to add some class to the proceedings.