Snapshots from Green Victoria (tedwords) wrote,
Snapshots from Green Victoria

written during a conference call.

There once was a weasel who decided to dye his fur a bright pink. There were a few reasons for this. First and foremost, pink was his favorite colour; he also detested the dull brown matted fur that covered his body. And finally, the color matched well with a pair of hot pink pumps that he liked to parade around in down in his hole.

The problem was, even though he was dying to do it, how was he going to find the dye that would do the job? The only solution that he could see was to travel five miles down to a large berry bush that grew in Farmer Weezy Wenkins field. If he could gather enough berries, he could carry them on his back and dump them into his bathtub, where he could stomp on them with a pair of clogs he had purchased in Prague and then roll around and rest in the tub for an hour.

The next day, the weasel wended his way toward Farmer Wenkins bountiful berry bush. As he made his way down a shopworn path, he encountered a hungry wolf. This wolf did not particularly find weasels to be a terribly tasty treat, but hadn't had much to eat in a few days, and needed something to see him through a dry spell.

"Where are you going, Mr. Weasel?" asked the curious and bright-eyed Wolf.

The weasel felt a chill creep along the fur on his back, and furtively looked around for a warm inviting hole that he might be able to crawl into. But alas, this was a desolate stretch of road, and there were no rodent ranches to be found anywhere.

"I'm traveling to Farmer Wenkins' place," replied the weasel cautiously. "I've been invited as guest of honor at the 5th annual Eva Gabor monster truck rally."

"Really?" said the wolf, sounding terribly ingratiating, and sidling closer to the weasel. "I just love monster trucks, and Green Acres was my favorite TV show of all time. Do you mind if I walk with you for a stretch?"

Well, of course, the weasel did, but he really wasn't in much a position to complain, so he let out a meek squeak and resigned himself to taking this journey for as long as he had to, while trying to find an escape route as soon as he possibly could.

Since this was a desolate stretch, he realized that he would need to keep the wolf entertained and distracted for as long as he could. But what rabbits could he pull out of his sequined hat? The frightened weasel had to come up with a quick solution but fast...

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