Happy birthday to my sexy ex! Josie, you are a wonderful mother, a good, caring person, a great friend, and I've been so fortunate to have you in my life for the past 27 years. I never dreamed when I first met that young girl who had volunteered to donate her rabbit for a theater production that I had made a partner for life, in the raising of three beautiful kids. And yet, here we are today.
Very nice, don't you think? Lovely sentiment, right? And I meant every word of it, when I posted it Sunday on Facebook. And yet, what did I get from Josie in response?
Thanks Ted ...I'd almost believe you love me but then you include THAT photo. ..lol
"I think it's a nice one," I remarked to Josie when I saw her later that day. "And a bunch of people liked it, too, so it couldn't have been that bad."
"They liked what you wrote," she replied. "But that photo is horrible."
"How can you say that?" I protested.
"I can say that because I am probably sixty pounds lighter now," she replied. "Look at how puffy my cheeks are. Look at that big fat belly. That is not a good photo me at all."
"You can't see any belly, you're wearing black." Josie chose to ignore me. The subject to her was closed. Sigh.
I mean, I get it. Josie is proud of the weight that she's lost through the years, and justifiably so. She's worked hard to stick to her diet, and certainly looks terrific. So maybe posting a photo that reminds her of what she looked like when she was less than petite isn't something she wants to see.
Except, I don't see the photo as a bad one! To me, Josie looks lovely in it. She appears calm and relaxed. I would say caring, too. She looks at peace. Her eyes are looking straight at the camera and she appears confident. That's exactly the way I like to think of Josie. What 's so bad about that, I ask you?
Personally, I think people can be beautiful at any shape or size, and Josie is certainly a beautiful woman now, and she was a beautiful woman then. Why do people have to get hung up on things like that?
Of course, I'm one to talk. I had photos taken of me in a tux a few weeks ago and someone commented that it looked as though the buttons on the suit were getting close to popping. It immediately put me on a spiral and has made it hard for me to look at any of the photos from that event. It also prompted me to join Weight Watchers, and I've so far lost seven pounds. I don't think I am too heavy, so I probably only have ten more pounds to go. Of course, Josie warns that the last five are the hardest.
So, I get it. People are vain, and women are impossible when it comes to their own photos, and will always complain, no matter which one you select. It's like those people who find one photo of themselves that they like and that's the only one they will ever use for the rest of their lives.
Still, I wish we could find it posible to love ourselves enough to look back on the echoes of the person we once were many years ago, and smile. Embrace it. Life's a rainbow, people exist on a spectrum. Like as many versions of yourself as you can.