Snapshots from Green Victoria (tedwords) wrote,
Snapshots from Green Victoria

Yeah, here's something you don't see every day. Me at a baseball game.

I was representing the company for a player of the month presentation at McCoy Stadium, and brought the kids. One thing I discovered: if you ever want to concentrate on a game, don't bring Corb, Theo or Ashes with you. It'll be impossible! Between Ashes biting Corb, Corb pinching Ashes, Theo fighting over seats with Ashes, Ashes talking about her fights with Alexis...impossible, I tell you. Easier to balance the pyramids on your nose.

On another another, I've been doing a lot of work on Amelia lately. Late Night is going to have to wait a while, because I have plans for Amelia. More on those plans later, though.

The first chapter is bothering me right now, however. I like the prologue, but during my time with ICM, I had made changes to the first few chapters, in order to remove 100 pages from the story. One of the changes I made was a three page first chapter called "What Amelia Wasn't." I found it fun to go against form and do the exact opposite of what you're supposed to do with an introductory chapter, and craft a list of opposites in a manner similar to the first chapter of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

In the revision, I chose to weave these details into the next chapter, to make them one. And in reviewing the book after a year or so...well, it just doesn't work as well for me. I like the short, staccato opening salvos of the original draft, which I felt drew readers into the story.

I'm tempted to let a few people read the two versions, side by side, for some feedback. Anyone care to volunteer?

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