Snapshots from Green Victoria (tedwords) wrote,
Snapshots from Green Victoria
tedwords

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This I believe

Okay, I may only be at the start of a new journey, but I've got to believe that I've picked up a few things during my other stages that I can take with me as I go forward. I think that this document may be a work in progress, a summation of what I believe to be true, what I should strive for, what path I need to stay true to as the remainder of the rich fabric of my life unfolds.



POINT ONE: I AM GAY.
A. That being said, I adore women. I always have, I always will. I love talking to women (so far I've found most women to be better conversationalists, although this opinion has slightly changed in the past ten months), I love flirting with women, I love trading glances with women, letting them think I'm interested in them. And yes, Josie, I have loved making love to MY woman. It wasn't simply an exercise in futility. those Live Journal addicts who have lusted after my Josie can turn to stone with the knowledge that, so far, at least, only I have known the hidden treasures that Dark Lady brings to the bedroom. (Editors note: terms of dealership may vary. This statement subject to certain time limitations, statutes, and constraints.)

B. I am seriously sexually attracted to men. I like the way they look, I like how they're built, I like the way that body hair falls on their legs and chests, I love the different shapes and sizes found down below. I have felt this way since I was ten years old. At least, when I used to have seriously intense dreams about a boy down the street named John. To this day, I can remember those dreams vividly. I tend to like guys in their 20s the best, however, I have found a number of guys in their 30s attractive of late. I draw the line below 21, and wouldn't really want to get involved in a relationship below 25.

POINT TWO: I'M A FATHER. And Point One and Two are not mutually exclusive. And I'm a good father, and I love my kids, and will always take care of them, always provide for them. And if you don't believe it's possible, you can go fuck yourself.

POINT THREE: I'M A WRITER. I've always written, ever since I was in second grade. And I'm not saying I'm the best writer, either--I know my weaknesses better than anyone. But I do have talent. And it's great that I can employ this talent in my daily life, and it's good that I have aspirations towards more creative publishing ventures, and what I've accomplished with my two novels this year is a great personal achievement. Whoever I allow to enter into my heart must be a person who understands this and will support this goal. As for myself, I must strive to have faith in my abilities and also work to focus on this goal again, once this quarter is over.

POINT FOUR: I AM A SOCIAL DRINKER, BUT MUST LEARN MY LIMITS. Those little tubes are dangerous. I should never have driven home Thursday night, and on work nights, I should never drink to the point where I still feel drunk at seven in the morning. And if I do, I need to avoid getting behind a wheel at all costs. I never want anything bad to happen. </b>

POINT FIVE: IF YOU CAN'T LAUGH AT YOURSELF, WHAT'S THE POINT OF BEING ALIVE? There is a place for seriousness, focus. But there is also a place for laughter in this world, too. I want to remember to laugh more. I want to remember my love for the irreverent, for the off-color, for the bawdy. I want to be laughed with and want to learn not to mind being laughed at. Somewhere I lost some of my sense of humor. I want it back. The time for fear, the time for hiding, the time for tears, has passed.

POINT SIX: KEEP EXCERCISING. You don't need much to stay in shape. and you've been doing well lately. KEEP IT UP. Don't backslide.

POINT SEVEN: WHAT YOU'RE PRESENTLY EATING WILL EVENTUALLY KILL YOU. Point six notwithstanding, your eating habits are abysmal. They must be improved. They're not as bad as three years ago, but they're still pretty bad. Sugars will be the death of me, cheese comes a close second. Practice more self control.



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